


Primadonna

by charmenna



Series: Geronimo & Primadonna [1]
Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Continuation, F/F, Oh My God
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-11-18
Packaged: 2018-12-18 10:40:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11872617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charmenna/pseuds/charmenna
Summary: " ...The gallery in question, which she was currently pacing outside of, inhabited a person Trixie hadn’t seen for nearly three years. It was someone that she had gone from missing every day until the point where her heart actually felt like it was going to break in tiny pieces, to barely thinking about. Or, letting herself think about more like."Sequel to "Geronimo"





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Aaaand we're back in action! Hey babes, this is the sequel to Geronimo - hopefully there is still some interest in this story. Thank you for your kind words on the last chapter of Geronimo, I really needed to take a break to get that coin and just sort of settle in my own being. Alas, here we are again for I don't know how many chapters - most likely four, possible five. Thank you in advance for smashing that kudos button and R&R-ing!

“Okay, I’m heading out now!” Trixie hollered from the small hallway of their new apartment, only receiving a grunt from her roommate in return. “I’ll be back in an hour or so, if you ever decide to stop moping around – could you make sure we have everything we need for the party?”

“I’m pretty sure we don’t have enough cups or snacks.” Kim muttered back at her, her friend’s voice still not implicating any form of excitement for their plans. Ever since Naomi had found a job back in Los Angeles, Kim had been moping around their apartment whenever she wasn’t at work, which was something that Trixie had little patience for.

“Kim, just check and send me a text if I need to get anything else.” Trixie sneered as she checked her purse one last time to make sure she had everything she needed. “Where are you going again?” Kim asked, her current mood had apparently not lulled her curiosity for what Trixie did with her life. Trixie had no intentions of telling Kim where she was going, or who she was going to meet. That was for her, and her alone to know. For now at least. “I’m just going to run some errands.” Was Trixie’s stressed reply as she hurried out of the door before Kim could say anything else.

 

* * *

 

 

The streets were busy and hot as she waltzed down the block, the grumpy faces of New York natives didn’t scare Trixie – she was far too excited for that. She had found that at twenty-four her mood had mellowed out. Her late teens to her very early twenties had been filled with so much angst, of course her freshman year at Boston University hadn’t made it any easier. That was all behind her now, she had graduated and found herself a small apartment with Kim in the outskirts of the grandiose city. Their apartment was admittedly in the shadier part of town, something that Kim liked to point out whenever they heard a noise coming from the hallway. For Trixie, being able to live in a place where she could get a job fetching coffee in a small art gallery was enough. Her parents had offered to pay for a better place, but she was determined to make it on her own. She was an adult now, and it was finally time to start acting like it.

Of course, said art gallery that she was currently heading towards was in fact not the one she worked at. The gallery in question, which she was currently pacing outside of, inhabited a person Trixie hadn’t seen for nearly three years. It was someone that she had gone from missing every day until the point where her heart actually felt like it was going to break in tiny pieces, to barely thinking about. Or, letting herself think about more like.

As she entered the gallery, her blue eyes scanned the place before she took another step. In all reality, there was a chance that it wouldn’t even be standing there if it wasn’t indirectly because of her. She hadn’t seen Katya for such a long time. Justin had made sure to check in on her now and again, Trixie suspected it was purely out of a guilty conscience, but any part of Katya she could grab for herself was undoubtedly welcomed. After she had graduated, he had sent her a text that contained nothing but an address and a smiley face.

She had been hesitant to go there, in all honesty she still was. Trixie had spent a copious amount of time trying to get over her ex, but life had moved on, like Katya had told her it would. They had messaged each other now and again – but like Trixie’s heartbreak, the texts had dwindled out as well. It had been difficult finding someone else to spend her time on, and none of those relationships had worked out either. Katya was still in the back of her mind, digging away somewhere in there.

Trixie was dragged from her thoughts as she heard a cackle coming from down the hall, in what appeared to be the main area. Sweat started to trickle down her neck as she followed the familiar noise, half of her contemplating whether she should just leave. She had not even told Kim where she was going, although she suspected that her friend knew more than she was letting on as usual. She straightened her pink A-line dress as she walked, now out in the main area. As Trixie scanned around the room, she saw her.

Katya’s back was turned towards her, standing in front of what appeared to be an abstract painting of sorts. Next to her was a woman with dark hair, and said woman had her arm wrapped around Katya’s shoulders. Trixie was instantly discouraged, something along the lines of pure, unadulterated jealousy running through her veins. She had not expected it to be like that. She had prepared herself for the eventuality that Katya had found someone else, Trixie knew that. She was there purely as a chance to rekindle as friends. Nothing more.

Before she could turn around and sprint out of there, a soft voice spoke from beside her: “Are you looking for anything special, sweetie?” Trixie jumped slightly and looked bewildered to her side. The woman was very pretty, her dark hair neatly curled with a single blonde streak that ran through her bangs. On anyone else, Trixie would had snorted and said that they looked like some Cruella De Ville- knock off, but the woman in question pulled it off impeccably.

Trixie’s eyes darted towards Katya, and found the older woman staring back at her, her red painted lips agape in awe. “N-no, I’m just looking.” Trixie mumbled, one of her hands reaching over to scratch at her other arm nervously. The woman looked confused as she looked between Katya and Trixie several times, before smiling at Trixie and quickly making herself scarce. Of course, Trixie wasn’t paying attention anymore, as she focused her stare onto Katya. The woman that had draped her arm over Katya’s shoulders looked confused as she stepped back and looked down on her phone.

Katya looked so different from what Trixie remembered. Her blonde hair was longer, streaks of grey melding into her curly hair. Her red shirt and skirt were in the same material, large ‘No’s spread across the fabric. Before Trixie could take in anything else, Katya strode towards her and engulfed her in a bear hug. Trixie’s arms draped around Katya’s shoulders, an unconscious attempt to wipe away any remnants from the last person that had touched Katya there. They stood there for a while, just holding each other. Trixie felt like she should be crying, but no tears would come. Instead, calm spread throughout her body – like a missing puzzle piece had just been retrieved, or like that feeling one would get when they think they had lost their phone but finally find it.

Finally, Katya leaned back, a dazzling smile spreading across her delicate face. “I was not expecting this.” She stated, the pure giddiness of her voice prompted a smile out of the younger blonde. “Me neither.” She replied, the smile on her face dampening a bit as Katya took her arms away from her. Trixie’s eyes darted back to where the mystery woman was standing, the other woman with the blonde streak in her hair now standing beside her. She barely registered that Katya was speaking to her before a thin hand gently grabbed her forearm.

“Trixie, I asked you what you were doing here?” Katya’s bemused voice repeated as Trixie finally looked back at her. Trixie tried to find the right words to say, she did not want Katya to think she was here in some ditch effort to get her back, nor would she want to make it seem like she was just there to say ‘hi’. “Me and Kim got an apartment here, I’m working at the gallery a few blocks down. Or, not so much work as just getting coffee and taking phone calls for the least important people. But I like it, I mean I just graduated in June and I got a job in New York so that’s good but it could be better of course, but you would know that because you started this up all by yourself and…” she stopped mid-sentence as she noticed that her smooth explanation had turned into a full-on ramble fest. Katya looked at her, smirking with one of her brows arched.

“That’s all good and well, except that it still doesn’t explain the impromptu visit. Did you miss me that much?” Katya asked, her smirk still apparent on her face yet it didn’t quite meet her eyes. Trixie wondered how she felt about all of this, if she had even wanted to see Trixie again or if she had been thinking about their reunion as much as she had. Trixie stared down at her feet as she tried to gather her scrambled thoughts, thus far her ‘devil may care’ attitude had gone out the window and she was desperate to gather some of her now lost dignity back.

“Justin texted me and said I should go say hi now that I live here. I just wanted to see how you were set up.” She stated as she glanced around the gallery. It really was beautiful, the walls and floor were in a matching pale wood, large paintings crowding around each other. The furniture in there were set in in a rococo style, which was definitely very Katya. As she looked back at Katya, the care free smile had returned to her lips, replacing her cheeky smirk. “I’m glad you did. We haven’t talked in a while, I would really want to know what you have been up to. Besides taking phone calls from the least important people, that is.” Katya replied, a hand reaching up to stroke Trixie’s arm again.

“Are you free now? There is a café down the street.” Trixie started, then winced before she continued: “Which you obviously know because you have worked here for like two years.”

Katya seemed hesitant as she scanned around the gallery, there were only a few customers there which the older woman seemed to notice as well as she looked back at the woman with the blonde streak and called out: “I’m taking a break ‘Nila, I’ll be back in an hour.”

The woman looked back, pretending like she hadn’t been observing the two blondes before she nodded and returned to staring at an otherwise un-watched painting. Katya sprinted away behind a small counter and grabbed her purse before returning to Trixie and dragging her out of the room. They headed outside, walking in silence to the small café Trixie had mentioned. As they found a table inside, Trixie told Katya that she was getting them coffee and took a much-needed break as she stood in line, breathing loudly to herself before she realized it could be interpreted as weird. She hastily ordered them two coffees, black for Katya, cream and sugar for herself.

She didn’t look at Katya again until she took both large cups and headed back towards their table. She was still so breathtakingly beautiful, the way she looked down at her napkin with a childlike curiosity, there was a small stamp on it that appeared to amuse her. “You still drink your coffee black, right?” Trixie asked as she set down the cups and sat down in the wooden chair opposite from Katya.

“Right on, Tracy.” Katya replied as she grabbed her cup and took a deep sip. Trixie rolled her eyes as she grabbed her own cup and looked down at the brown liquid. There were so many words that had been left unsaid between the two of them, so much they needed to discuss. Trixie had spent so much time being angry with Katya, Violet and the world, really. Even if Katya had done what was best for them both, it had been hard to realize when all she wanted to do was cry, yell and cry some more. “So, how are you? How was college? I believe I missed most of it, even though it doesn’t feel like I did.” Katya asked before taking another sip of her coffee. Trixie sighed, not knowing if she should give Katya the truth or the slightly improved version of the truth. Of course, she would be able to tell if Trixie lied, so the truth was probably the only reasonable thing to give.

“After we- you know, it was rough. I think I spent the remainder of my first year lounging around in sweats and crying over just about anything. But it got better, I patched things up with Violet just before we graduated so that’s good. Uh, otherwise nothing much. Graduated with honours and all that.” Trixie absentmindedly replied, her brain occupied with thoughts of the surrealistic feeling she had about the situation at hand. Katya looked back at her, her blue eyes more earnest now. Even though she was older, the grey in her hair was the only sign Trixie could notice that time had actually passed. “What about you? You seem like an established business woman, Ms. Zamolodchikova – what happened?” Trixie continued, the teasing tone she had when she used Katya’s formal title did not escape the other woman as she chuckled and shook her head in response.

“I don’t know about established per se, but I get around. I still kind of miss teaching, but I’ve heard rumours that the new art history professor is a bore – so I’ve got that going for me. Other than that, it’s the same old – hoping someone will buy the paintings we invest into the gallery, sacrificing virgins and going to nudist wiccan meetings.” Trixie wheezed at Katya’s reply, the warm feeling of familiarity now spreading throughout her body.

“I can’t believe I’m here, to be honest. It’s so weird to think of that first year, how messed up everything was. I’m really happy to see you, Katya.” Trixie felt like she needed to get it off her chest, the look on Katya’s place confirming that she had been thinking the same thing as her. Whenever they had talked to each other over the years, it had just been to ask how the other one was doing, or Katya sending weird, Russian cat memes that Trixie never understood.

She hadn’t talked to Katya in over a year, and hadn’t seen her in nearly three years. That all seemed to float away, like time didn’t matter anymore. “It feels like a lifetime ago, Trix. That stuff isn’t important anymore, I honestly believe that it was good for me. I’m just sorry it had to get so infected between us.” Katya replied, seemingly more earnest and mature than Trixie had ever heard her talk. With Katya, you could always expect a weird quip or anecdote, it had always been weird to hear her say something that was completely serious.

“Are you happy? I saw that woman back there, is she your girlfriend?” Trixie asked as she glanced between Katya and her coffee. Her feet shuffled beneath their table in nervousness, she wasn’t sure if she wanted to hear the answer. Katya’s incessantly loud wheeze caused the already blooming blush on Trixie’s cheeks to deepen. “Raja? Oh no, no, no. Her and Manila, the other chick you saw back there, are married. I’m still flying solo, Tamika. ‘Been waiting for you all this time.”

The last words Katya said caused Trixie’s eyes to bulge as she looked back at the Russian. Her face was completely red at this point, the poignant look in Katya’s eyes announcing the need for an actual response from Trixie. If she only had a good answer to give. “Oh, I – uh, uh.” Was all she could sputter out, the confusion spreading inside of her brain lightened as Katya started to laugh again. “I’m kidding, relax. I assume you didn’t look me up to get together again, I just wanted to see your crawfish impression again. I’ve missed it.” Katya retorted as she drank the last of her coffee.

“I kept in touch with Justin, he already told me that you have been crafting your own little Trixie alter in your apartment – jig is up, Kathy.” Trixie was finally able to joke, her blush lightening as she huffed at Katya.

“I told him to stop by your place and get some of your hair, but I never heard back from him. I guess the mention of a voodoo doll was too much for his gentle soul.”

“He did ask me for a pair of dirty underwear and a vial of blood, I should have known that would be from you.”

As they shot insults at each other, both Trixie and Katya returned to their normal state of being – just two people that could laugh and enjoy each other’s company. That was mainly what Trixie had missed, what had often been forced to take second place to the hurt and confusion. The hour crept away, Trixie had barely even noticed that any time had passed before Katya looked at her phone and sighed. “I need to be getting back, Trix. Even the boss can’t take all day breaks.”

Trixie nodded and stood up, grabbing her purse from the table as she looked back at Katya once more. “I need to go grab some stuff anyway, I managed to convince Kim we should throw a party.”

“Oh, do you have some friends that moved here too?” Katya asked inquisitively as they walked outside.

“Yeah, a lot of them actually. You should stop by if you have some time, I could message you the address.” Trixie offered before she had managed to process the idea in her head. Katya pondered the advance before she reached out to grab Trixie’s hand. “I’ll try to make it, we’re doing inventory tomorrow to it might run a bit late.”

Trixie looked down at their joined hands and squeezed Katya’s hand in return before she reluctantly let it go. She needed to remember why she was there. Just friends and nothing else, that was the plan and it was what she was sticking with. She knew to leave well enough alone with Katya, even if every fibre of her being wanted to know if she could have the reunion scene she had pictured in her head so many nights. They stopped in front of Katya’s gallery, the “Zamolodchikova & Luzon” sign glistening in bright red above them.

“It was nice to see you, Trix. Please keep in touch.” Katya wrapped her arms around Trixie again as she spoke, allowing the younger blonde an opportunity to relish in her smell for a while before they broke apart again. Trixie mumbled something incoherent before she offered Katya one last smile and then walked away. Within five minutes she had texted Katya her address, a new sense of hope entering her body as she left.

 

* * *

 

 

Katya looked back at Trixie, quickly digging a cigarette out of her purse and placing it between her quivering lips as she watched the young blonde bounce away. Katya’s hands shivered slightly as she lit the cigarette and took a deep drag. The whole time she had spent with her ex-girlfriend had been odd, she had to remind herself that they were in fact not together and that it wouldn’t be acceptable for her to just touch her anymore. They weren’t in that place, and they hadn’t been there for a long time, yet that thought wouldn’t etch itself in Katya’s mind.

She had nearly forgotten, that was when she had grabbed Trixie’s hand. Even if it was just for a moment, it had felt like they were them again. Katya didn’t know if Trixie had been seeing someone over the years, but she had not. Could not, more like. There had been fleeting romances, usually something that only lasted over one night. She had lied whenever Justin or Ginger had asked her if she was trying to get over Trixie, she had told them that it had been over for her for a long time. In truth, it never felt like it was over.

Katya had made the decision to let Trixie go, and she stood by that decision. However, that did not stop her from engulfing herself in her work, trying to convince herself that she was just busy and not that she was letting herself stay buried in the hole Trixie had created as they split up. Or, the one she had created for herself. Trixie seemed like she was happy, more sure of herself than she had been before. It was strange seeing her in an environment where they were both adults in the same phase of life.

As she entered the main room of the gallery again, Manila and Raja flocked up beside her and immediately started asking her questions. “Was that the infamous Trixie?” Raja asked, and Katya only nodded in response. They asked her something else, but she wasn’t listening. Instead, she just looked down at her phone, where a message from Trixie had already appeared on her screen. “How would you feel about going to a party in a questionable neighbourhood tomorrow?”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Untz untz untz. I had NO IDEA it would take me this long to update, thank you for your patience. As always, a huge thank you for all of your comments, it really does help me a lot. Again, there will probably be around five chapters or so of Primadonna, so I hope you want to stick around for that. I don't feel like I deserve you guys with my irregular updates, but thank youuuu so much. Happy readings my doves!

Time management had never been an issue for Trixie, she had always made sure to be on time wherever she went. Some would dare to call her a control freak and she probably would have to agree with them, but at that exact moment – she had no idea where her mind was. She had an hour to get ready before their guests started to arrive, and more importantly, an hour before Katya was set to get there. If she got there, that is. Katya had texted her something ambiguous about how she was not sure of how they were going to make it there in time, but she was very excited to see “everyone” again. Everyone was not specifically aimed towards Trixie, which admittedly made her feel a jealous twinge run through her body.

No matter of how the night was going to play out, Trixie had no time to think about her ex-girlfriend now. She bolted around in her yellow kimono dress. Having decided to forego her usual pink attire, the silky dress with embroidered flowers on it made her feel like a true seventies mom. Her hair was coiffed into perfect, blonde waves, her make up softer than it usually was. If there was any way to see that Trixie had become older, it would have been her look for the evening.

“Trixie, people are coming! Did you get the punch out of the fridge?” Kim shouted at her from across the apartment, causing her blonde friend to roll her eyes not only because of her friend’s still present lisp - but also because the job of keeping track of the booze was not meant to be her assignment.

Deciding to take her annoyance in stride, she quickly put on her high heels and clomped into their small kitchen to grab the big bowl of punch out of their fridge. Whilst walking as carefully as she could, she took the bowl out to their spacious living room, where their kitchen table had been moved to fit the various kinds of alcohol they were offering their friends. As she set the bowl down, she looked for some kind of alcohol to put in it. Deciding on a bottle of vodka, she unscrewed the bottle with a plop and proceeded to pour it into their carefully made punch. Obviously not one to multi task, Trixie remained very focused on her pouring to make sure she was not downing an entire bottle in there and did not hear when people came into their apartment.

A pair of hands snuck around her waist, causing the blonde woman to squeal and drop the entire bottle into the bowl. As the liquid splattered all over her dress and the rest of the table, she could see the currently faceless person’s life and death flashing before her eyes.  “What the actual fuck.” Trixie growled as she looked down on her dress and then swirled around to make sure the person that did that to her would get their well-deserved earful.

A bashful Sasha came into view, her bald head as pink as her face was. “I am so sorry, I had no idea you would get so scared.” The bald woman apologized, the panic in her eyes enough to make Trixie’s anger float away. She sighed and reached her hand out to pinch Sasha’s waist a bit more roughly than she normally would have. Sasha yelped, although a smile crept onto her face. “You are such an idiot.” Trixie pointed her finger at her friend before she continued, “And you have to clean this shit up – I need to go change.”

Before Trixie could do that though, more people started to pour in. People she did not know, to be exact. Trixie stared down the hallway that was connected to their living room in surprise, the people down in her hall cackling to themselves about something. Then, it dawned on her. Two of the women were Raja and Manila, Katya’s friends. The third one she did not know. Trixie stared at them until they finally looked back at her, Raja’s smile broadened until she looked down and caught sight of Trixie’s dress and the huge red stain on her stomach. Trixie noticed the look and a blush immediately crept onto her cheeks. “Hey, you guys – we had a bit of an emergency here.” She greeted them nervously, receiving sympathetic looks from each of the women in the hallway. “Well, come in, come in!” Trixie continued, beckoning the women towards her with her hands.

“I don’t think we actually got to meet each other properly the last time we met, I’m Raja and this is my wife Manila.” Raja greeted Trixie with a hug whilst keeping some distance so the stain would not get onto her white suit. “No, I’m glad we finally get to talk. Things got a little crazy last time.” Trixie replied as she turned to hug Manila just as carefully. “Oh, we totally get it girl, you hadn’t seen Kat in such a long time.” Manila waved her off.

Finally, Trixie turned towards the woman she knew for a fact she hadn’t met and smiled gently. “Well, I’m Trixie, this mess of an apartment is mine.”

The woman chuckled and turned it in for a hug as well. “Girl, you should see my place. I’m Shea, I know Katya from… around.” As they parted, Trixie caught sight of a twinkle in Shea’s eyes. She had no idea what she was talking about, but her usual insecurities when it came to Katya was enough to make her slightly suspicious. Deciding not to dwell on it too much, she simply smiled. “Speaking of, where is the woman of the hour?” she asked, of course having noticed ever since the women walked in that Katya was absent from their company.

“Katya said she had to run and ‘do something’, now, that something is a mystery for all of us.” Raja explained, all of them being able to chuckle at Katya’s ‘Katya-isms’. “Okay, well, you guys go and get some drinks, I’m going to try and sort myself out.”

 

* * *

 

 

Trixie watched the group of women head towards the drink table where Sasha was still trying to get out some of the stains she had caused. As she headed into her room to change, she heard the doorbell ring and Kim’s voice greeting their guests. She had only told Kim that Katya was showing up a few hours before they had to get ready, and had to be disappointed with the reaction she had gotten. Her curvy and loveable friend had been with her since the first day of college, but she had also been forced to go through all of the drama Trixie had endured with, and after, Katya. So, naturally, she was suspicious of whatever contact they had with each other. Trixie, on the other hand, felt like ever since all that drama had happened – it was like her friends would not trust her with anything related to her feelings. At the end of the day, Trixie got the feeling that she was being treated as damaged goods in a way.

Having eventually decided on a pink pencil skirt and a matching long-sleeved crop top, she put on a chunky necklace before hurrying out of her room again. She knew her ass looked great in the skirt, and could only hope that Sasha would keep her hands to herself after their mishap. As she got to the living room, a few more people had already arrived. She saw Violet, Pearl and a few of Kim’s friends from work sitting on their couch. As Violet and Pearl saw her, they cheered and threw their arms up into the air. Trixie shook her head slightly and smirked, her friends had apparently had a few drinks before they had even gotten there. “Who invited these bitches?” she hissed, popping her tongue for added effect. As she noticed Sasha sitting next to Raja on the floor, deep in conversation – she realized that she might have been a bit harsh on her friend. Sasha was not like her other friends, whom could be a bit harsh with each other without it being an issue, Sasha was different in a way that could throw Trixie off at times. She was sensitive and took things more seriously than Trixie ever could. With that in mind, she crept over and plopped down on the floor next to her bald friend. She leaned forward and rested her chin on Sasha’s shoulder and felt the other woman jump before she realized it was Trixie.

“Hey, we’re matching now.” Trixie commented, motioning towards Sasha’s pink A-line dress. Sasha turned her head towards her without knocking their heads together and chortled nervously. A pink tint spread over her face, a feature only Sasha Velour could portray as charming. “I like that outfit on you, but I am sorry about your dress.”

Trixie snorted and sat up straight again, gently shoving her friend with her shoulder. Before she could say anything else, a vision of black and blonde darted across the room. Her eyes were instantly trapped on Katya, despite feeling Sasha shuffle beside her. Not only was she wearing a flower embroidered blouse and mini skirt, but Katya had also cut her hair since Trixie had last seen her. It was now just below her collarbones, the curliness of it making her look wild and unkempt. However, in typical Katya-fashion, she still managed to look polished in her madness. In her hands, she held a bouquet of pink daisies if Trixie’s memory served her right.

As her ex-girlfriend stood in the middle of the living room, all eyes on her, her blue eyes met Trixie’s and she exclaimed, incredibly out of breath: “I am sorry I’m late.”

Trixie got to her feet, a broad smile on her face. She went to hug Katya, but the older woman pushed the flowers into her arms before she could embrace her. “I thought you might need some flowers, I hear it’s a custom for moving in parties.” Surprised at the rejection, Trixie simply held onto the flowers and motioned for Katya to sit down. “Sure, Kim tends to dry them up and grind the petals for ‘organic colours’ though.”

“Do not come for me!” Kim retorted from the couch. “Hey, Katya.” She continued as Katya managed to squeeze in between Shea and Manila on their small chaise lounge. Katya waved at Kim and everyone else, whilst apparently having forgotten to look at Sasha and Raja. “Hi, everyone. I think I’ve met almost everyone here, but I’m Trixie’s friend.”

Hearing Katya call her a friend was odd. If Trixie had her way, they would still be what they had been all those years ago. Having realized that she had not gotten herself a drink yet, Trixie got off the floor and headed towards the now cleaned drink table whilst the other girls chatted amongst themselves. Whilst she poured herself some punch in a beer cup, she was happy that someone had thought of putting on some music so she could drown out some of the thoughts that were currently running through her head. It was such a stupid thing to be concerned with, yet she could not help but to get stuck in her own head and start to wonder whether inviting Katya was such a good idea or not.

“Hey, are you okay?” She heard Violet’s voice coming from beside her. Trixie sighed, knowing that Violet had been nervous to come when she heard Katya was going to be there as well. “I’m fine, how are you?” Trixie answered Violet’s question with what she really wanted to discuss. She knew this conversation was not going to be about her, despite of the fact that it was her ex-girlfriend that was currently laughing at one of Kim’s stupid puns.

“I don’t know, it’s sort of weird that I haven’t spoken to her since everything happened.” Violet continued, crossing her thin arms over her chest. Trixie peered to her side as she took a sip of her punch, instantly meeting Katya’s intense stare. A hot wave passed through her body as the older woman swallowed whatever was left in her own cup before standing up. “It looks like you’re about to get the chance to.” Trixie muttered to Violet, whom shifted uncomfortably where she stood as Katya approached them. She swept in next to Trixie, reaching behind her to grab a bottle of beer. “How are you ladies doing?” Katya asked in her typical fashion.

Trixie could feel heat radiating off of the woman standing next to her. The magnetism they shared, she had always been so in awe off. She never felt like she completely understood what it was about Katya that drew her in so much. Whilst they stood there beside one another, she could almost pretend like everything was back to normal. Like nothing bad had ever happened between them. Katya’s arm brushed against her own as she spoke to Violet, Trixie was only able to hear snippets of their conversation as Katya was still touching her, but she also realized that she needed to keep some sort of sense. She stepped back a little and tried to focus on what Violet was saying. “… So, what I really wanted to say is that I’m sorry for what happened. I know that doesn’t really fix anything since I cost you both a job and a girlfriend because I wanted to get better grades – if it would make anything better I spent the following months scared that Trixie was going to kick my ass.” Violet rambled in a way Trixie had only heard her do once, which was when she was giving Trixie practically the same speech.

Trixie peered over at Katya, unsure of how the other woman would react. Even though Katya seemed calm, Trixie could see a twinge in her eye that was rarely ever there. “All of that shit was so long ago, so it doesn’t really matter. I’m not going to pretend like you didn’t instigate something that completely turned my life around, but in the end, leaving was my choice so that’s not on you, sweet.” Katya replied earnestly, the mellow kindness in her tone made Trixie want to hold her tight and never let her go. Violet seemed relieved as well, and she pardoned herself after that – the conversation they needed to have was finally done with and she could relax. Trixie on the other hand, had not been so tense in quite some time.

Katya turned around to face her, her red-lipped smile only broadening as she saw Trixie’s proud expression. “I’m going to guess that you wanted that conversation to happen.”

Trixie was equally as relieved as Violet was that she had finally been able to apologize to Katya in person. After they had made up entirely, Violet and her had spent many drunken conversations debating whether Violet should contact the blonde Russian. Trixie had always told her not to, that it was unnecessary to stir the pot. They had spent their entire college experience being mad at each other, and Trixie was not even the one that had been practically forced to move in the end. “Yeah, for her sake. I know what she did was really shitty, but she’s spent all these years feeling awful about everything.” Trixie replied truthfully, not knowing what else to say.

Katya stepped closer to her and quickly peered to her side before placing the one hand she had free from a cup on Trixie’s hip. “I mostly did it for you, although I don’t really hold a grudge. Now that I know you’re definitely not out to get me back, I guess I should at least try to be friends with you.”

 

* * *

 

 

Trixie was confused by what Katya had said, did she want Trixie to say that she wanted her back, or was it just the alcohol talking? She barely even registered that people went to get drinks, having to carefully grab bottles behind the two women. It was only when Katya tugged her along to the kitchen that Trixie realized where they were. She could have stared into Katya’s eyes for an eternity, trying to figure out what was going on in that brilliant mind of hers. Once they were in the kitchen, Trixie hopped onto the counter and stared down at Katya, whom hopped on next to her. “What are you talking about?”

“Don’t tell me that you don’t know, Trixie.” The Russian replied with a poignant tone. Trixie did not know what to say. She had told herself for so long that if she ever were to meet Katya again, it would only be as friends. Of course, once she had actually met her that rational thought was pushed way back in her head. “I actually have no idea, why don’t you enlighten me instead of trying to weasel an answer from me?” Trixie huffed as she downed the rest of her drink.

“I saw you with that girl when I came in, that Sasha person.” Katya said frankly, and looked equally as annoyed when Trixie burst out laughing. “You are officially a nut job, I’m not into anything with Sasha.” She managed to get out, trying to control her giggles as Katya looked increasingly annoyed.

“She stared at you the entire time we were talking to Violet. I know that look Trixie, I had that look when it came to you. She’s smitten.” Katya shrugged as she took another sip of what appeared to be a vodka soda. If she was not drunk, then she had to be crazy. There was no way that Sasha liked Trixie in that way, they had been friends for so long that Trixie barely even registered that the other woman was… A woman. More so, the word ‘had’ hurt more than anything else. “Okay, so if you only ‘had’ that look, then why do you care?” Trixie retorted, a challenging look in her eyes.

“I don’t.”

“Yes, you do.”

Katya looked down on her lap, a sigh escaping from the thin woman as she twirled the cup in her hands. “Okay, so maybe I do care – wouldn’t anyone care if their ex has someone new?”

Trixie shrugged, she understood Katya’s logic, but everything still wouldn’t make sense for her. “But I already told you that I don’t have anyone new, so why are you so bummed out? I, for example, know that you must have fucked that Shea girl – and that just took one look from her as she tried to explain where the two of you met.” She hissed, having decided that taking the high road was not for her. Katya suddenly looked up to meet her gaze, a surprised look of panic flaring through her eyes. “That was a long time ago, way before I met you.”

“You don’t need to explain yourself to me though, I don’t have the right to question your decisions anymore Kat. Just like you don’t have the right to get all grumpy on me either.” Trixie tried to reason with her ex, keeping her gaze steady on her. Katya’s eyes, however, flickered nervously between Trixie and her lap. “I’m not grumpy, I just thought you should know that I’m completely fine with it.”

When people tried to play a victim, it never sat right with Trixie. She was not into playing games, nor had she ever been. “Well, obviously, you’re not. Is that why you put your hand on my hip? I saw you glancing over to the other girls before you did it.” Possessive Katya had always been a turn on for her, but not when it got this messy. “We haven’t met for such a long time Katya, you can’t dump me like four years ago, and then get jealous if a girl happens to like me now. It’s not fair.” Trixie’s tone was turning more sour by the minute, prompting Katya to shrink in her seat. What right did she have to turn up here and act like she was a jealous teenager?

“I know it’s not fair, but I’ve always actively tried not to think about you with someone else – even if I’ve been with other people since we broke up.” Katya admitted, the admission of her sleeping with other people gave Trixie an uncomfortable feeling in her gut. She knew Katya must have hooked up with someone at some point, she certainly had herself, but something about it did not sit right with her. “Well, I have too. Listen, I wouldn’t have looked you up if I thought I would give you any type of bad feeling. I honestly just want us to talk and have honest conversations with each other. So, why don’t you start now?” Trixie rambled, almost certain that someone could hear them at this point. Katya continued to look down in her lap, not answering until Trixie wrapped an arm around her shoulder for comfort, even if she was mostly just annoyed at Katya. Her annoyance was not lightened when Katya shrugged the arm off her.

“Why are you being such a bitch right now?” the words flew out of Trixie’s mouth before she could stop them. Like Cady Heron had once said, the words kept coming out like word vomit. Katya stared up at her, anger now flowing through her beautiful features. “Take a wild -fucking- guess, Trix.” Katya sneered before jumping off the counter and heading off. Right before she disappeared back into the living room, she could hear Katya hiss “She’s all yours.”

Knowing what was about to come next, Trixie sighed loudly as Sasha stepped into the kitchen. Tears started to dwell up behind her eyes. She had never seen Katya behave like this before, she was typically the calm one that never got into any arguments that were not well-deserved. “Are you okay, Trixie?” she could hear Sasha’s soft voice as she stared into her cup.

“No.”

Soft hands took the cup from her and helped her down from the counter. Sasha was tall, but Trixie still towered over her. Of course, she towered over most people so that was not really a surprise.

Trixie valued Sasha for a second, not knowing whether she should tip around the issue or not. If her looking at Trixie had been what had gotten Katya annoyed, surely Sasha’s denial of her supposed crush would be enough to settle the Russians mind. “Sasha, Katya told me that she thought you liked me – that’s why she got so annoyed. I don’t think she meant to snap at you.” Trixie explained, trying to scan Sasha’s face to see her reaction. A surprised look spread over her friend at first, and then an intense blush. Trixie started to panic, this was not the kind of situation she had expected to find herself in.

Instead of Sasha saying anything, she simply leaned in with clear intentions. Trixie was too stunned to move, then suddenly she felt a brush of soft lips against her own.

She was fucked.

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heeey. Goodness, this chapter is definitely going to be me trying to compensate for being so crap at updating regularly - I'm sure I don't need to go on and on again about being busy, but yeah. I have read all of your comments, and honestly I've been sort of suffering from a major writer's block on top of everything else, but your words definitely helped me finish this. For the sake of my own sanity, there are only two chapters left after this, the last chapter will serve as sort of an epilogue to our little story here. Thank you so much for everything, and I sincerely hope you enjoy this chapter. This is also heavily unedited, so if there are any error's I do apologize.

Katya would under no circumstance consider herself to be a jealous woman, it had never been her style nor had she condoned jealousy from any of her partners. In any of her earlier relationships, she had always been the one that had been accused of not caring enough, even if that had not been the case. For instance, when she dated a girl back in college, Katya refused to care even when said girl started to date other people. It was only when the girl had fully stopped calling her that Katya realized it had gone to an entirely new level. Of course, her relationship with Trixie had been intense enough to turn her into a cliché.

She knew she really had no right to be so invasive when it came to her ex’s love life, but seeing how Sasha had looked at Trixie before the blonde had even realized Katya was there was enough to make her livid. Katya wasn’t stupid by any means, she realized why she was jealous – a small part of her had assumed that they would get back together, seeing that might not be the case was far too much to handle.

After Katya had stormed off, she had gathered her things and friends as inauspiciously as possible and left just as a flustered Trixie had stormed into the hallway. Raja and Manila had been sensible enough to keep quiet as they rode the subway home to Katya’s apartment, the only one to falter being Shea. “Girl, what the hell happened over there?” she started, but was interrupted by the dark blonde herself before she could utter another word. “Not right now.”

“But…”

“Just… Not now.”

Trixie deserved every chance to be happy, Katya owed her that much. Even if nothing was going on between her and her friend thus far, who’s to say that it wouldn’t – or shouldn’t for that matter. They had never been good for each other, maybe they had been in some ways, but practicality was not running in their favour. Who could she even be for Trixie? Her old professor that couldn’t keep her hands to herself? Katya’s own life had certainly been the one to take the greatest hit from the aftermath of their relationship, but she had already been jaded before she met Trixie and the younger blonde hadn’t had the chance to get there yet.

The days that followed were sombre and lacking in any sort of ‘pick me up’. Katya kept going about her daily life, pretending for her own sake in front of Raja and Manila that she had her shit together. The only person she would break down in front of was Justin, and he wasn’t there.

The gallery was really starting to come together for their annual display that featured fresh, new artists. All of the girls had gone on a manhunt as the city never lacked in talented young people that deserved to catch their big break, but you needed to know the right places to go to if you wanted a chance to snatch them up before someone else did. On a particularly sunny morning, Katya had gotten dressed in a black, velvet jumpsuit with exaggerated sleeves. Even though she could feel sweat trickle down her back on her way to work, the prospects of putting her pale legs on display was nothing she was ready for just yet. She glanced down at the phone in her hand and checked to see if she had received any messages whilst she had gotten a cup of iced tea for herself. She had not. Her phone had been dead silent the last few days, to be honest, she did enjoy it to some extent as she had never gotten the concept of constantly texting or calling her friends. If she wanted to tell them something, she would.

A cold breeze soothed her sweaty body as she stepped into the gallery, having temperature controlled rooms had turned out to be a larger investment for her own well-being than it had been for the paintings they displayed. Manila was already by their reception, deep in conversation over the phone. “Sure, I’ll get someone over there. I can’t promise you anything though sweetie, we don’t usually display that sort of art here. Mhm, yes, we’ll come by in a little bit.” She hung up just as Katya placed her plastic cup on the reception so she could catch her curly strands of hair in a large banana clip.

“Let me guess, some kid wants us to look at the sculpture he made from ravioli cans?” Katya snickered as she secured her hair in the clip.

“Close. Some girl is painting with compost and it’s apparently all they talk about in Brooklyn, this is the third person that’s called me about her.” Manila muttered, clearly not pleased with the hammering customers. “I can head over there, it’s fine.” Katya chipperly offered, her red lips pouting in a childish manner. Manila eyed her suspiciously, the blonde lock in her hair threatening to fall from her carefully hair sprayed up-do.

“You just want to get away from looking at our book keeping, you shady bitch.”

Katya considered her for a second, a broad smirk creeping up onto her cheeks as she shrugged. “If that’s what you want to believe, ‘Nila. I, however, am personally offended by what you’re suggesting.”

“Sure you are, now, get to stepping’ and leave me alone.”

On the subway ride over to Brooklyn, Katya pondered how she could best let the kid down easy. When they had just opened the gallery, she had wanted to give everyone a chance no matter how talented they were. Of course, in time she had realized that just wasn’t possible if you wanted to run a successful business. Despite of the logic she had instilled in herself over the years, it still hurt to see people’s faces fall as she told them ‘no’.

The café she had been pointed towards by some helpful strangers was the typical bohemian coffee place you would find around New York, Katya could practically see the green paint chip off the concrete walls as she entered and was immediately met by a wall of aromatic scents. As she had no idea whom she was supposed to be meeting there, she trusted that the person would recognize her instead.

She ordered another iced tea for herself and managed to find a small table. No one had approached her yet, when she looked down at her phone it showed that the person was five minutes late. Katya huffed under her breath as she took a sip of her tea, glancing around the café as she felt the cold beverage sooth her throat. Suddenly, a familiar figure turned around to look at her and made her way over to her table. Katya would have panicked if it wasn’t for the instant shock of seeing Kim Chi, Trixie’s closest friend, approaching her table and sitting down opposite from her. “Kim, what are you doing here?” Katya furrowed her brows as she waited for the younger woman’s response.

“I had to meet you close to work, I’m on my lunch break.” Kim stated as a matter of factly, like Katya must’ve been out of it to even question such a thing. Deciding to ignore that particular tone, Katya sighed before she continued:

“I’m guessing that you are the aspiring new artist I’m supposed to meet.”

“You would be correct, yes. I knew you would try to weasel out of meeting me if I had just told you it was me, so I needed to get creative. That, and I don’t have a girlfriend anymore which frees up a lot of my time.” Kim explained as a waiter brought over a cup of hot chocolate for her. Upon the realization that she had been tricked over to Brooklyn during one of her busier work weeks to talk to her ex’s best friend was enough to make Katya’s temple pulsate with annoyance. “In that case, I have two questions for you.” Katya raised two of her bony fingers and bent down one as she asked: “Did Trixie set you up to this?”

“No, she would kill me if she knew I was here – she’s pretty pissed off right now.” Kim replied with wide eyes. Katya snorted, but neglected to reply as she simply bent down the other finger as well. “Do you know if it’s okay to smoke in here?”

“I think so, Pearl usually does when we’re here. I’ll go get an ash tray for you.” Kim hastily replied before getting up to fetch Katya her promised ash tray. So Trixie was pissed off, it wasn’t really something that should have surprised her yet she had had few interactions with an infuriated Trixie. The whole situation was absurd to her, she had things to do and places to be – when her co-workers found out that she had been lured to Brooklyn by one of her previous students whom also happened to be her ex’s best friend. Nothing was right in Katya’s world anymore.

She took a deep drag of her cigarette as Kim returned with a metal ash tray. “So,” Katya said between puffs of her cigarette, “I don’t mean to be rude, but what the fuck am I doing here?”

Kim glanced at her as she took a sip of her drink, seemingly considering Katya before she replied. “Trixie won’t tell me what happened. After you left she ran into her room in tears and Sasha left looking even worse for wear.” Katya’s face fell at Kim’s words, even if she had been quite angry as well there was no part of her that wanted to cause that much trouble.

“I never meant to do all of that.” She muttered under her breath as she took a final drag of her cigarette before putting it out into the ash tray. After more anxiety crept into her body she decided to immediately light another one, ignoring the look Kim gave her. “I just jumped to my own, stupid conclusions and I realize now that was not the best decision I could have made.” She continued, a look of shame washing over her sharp features. Katya had really fucked up this time, suddenly her anger and reaction towards what she had assumed to be a developing relationship between Trixie and Sasha seemed unnecessary.

To further her own shame, hearing Kim say that neither Trixie nor Sasha appeared to be happy after she had left secretly made her slightly pleased with herself. What that said about Katya’s own morals was questionable.

“I mean, yeah. You know it’s super obvious that you still want Trixie, right?” Kim continued, prompting Katya to cough violently. “We broke up a long time ago, it’s not like…” Katya immediately protested in order to defend herself, but her words fell short as she saw Kim’s incredulous stare. There wasn’t really a point in trying to deny it, Katya had no poker face left.

“Okay, yes, I still love her. She’s difficult to forget.”

Despite of the fact that she really didn’t know Kim that well, the younger woman almost seemed to be proud of her. Kim’s proud features made Katya wonder why she hadn’t spent more time with her before. Her and Trixie’s relationship had to be kept a secret, but Kim had known for a while before they had split up. There had been so much shame involved for Katya back then, however, Kim appeared to be a good enough mediator between the two blondes. Of course, only one of them knew about it, which Katya hoped would not change.

“I think she loves you too. Whatever you think is going on with her and Sasha, just cut the crap. Nothing is going on even if Sasha wants it to or not.” Kim stated. Katya stared at her incredulously, ignoring the burnt-out cigarette in her hand until the weak flame started to burn her skin. She mindlessly put it out in the ash tray, trying to process Kim’s words before she replied. She had to tread carefully here and remind herself that she wasn’t actually having this conversation with Trixie and that nothing Kim said really meant anything until it came straight from the horse’s mouth.

“I left her for a reason, who’s to say it will work now? All I’ve done since I entered her life is mess it up.”

“I’m not going to sit here and say that you haven’t in some ways, but Trixie’s never been happier or more at peace than when she’s with you. That’s got to count for something, Katya.” Kim smirked, her knowing look making it appear like this was already a done deal for her. “Plus, this desperate, plagued pining you two have been up to for like four years is getting old. You’re not the one that had to sit through Trixie’s rants when you posted a picture of yourself on Facebook with some other girl.”

Katya’s eyebrows furrowed as she tried to remember when picture that could have been. The only one she could think of was a girl she had hooked up with a few times called Sharon, that was about it. To think that Trixie had been peeved by that was oddly comforting for Katya. At least she wasn’t the only one that was jealous. “That is true. I’ll tell you what, give me your phone.” Katya replied and stretched her hand out over the table to Kim with a disciplinary look in her eyes. The curvy brunette immediately placed her overly decorated iPhone in Katya’s hand, whether it was because she trusted Katya well enough or because she used to be her teacher was a question Katya would prefer to be left unanswered.

Katya opened Kim’s phone and clicked away, silently cursing herself for not bringing her glasses. After she was done, she swiftly handed the phone back to Kim with a faint smile on her crimson lips. “I added my number in there, why don’t you just give me a call or text when you talk to Trixie. I can’t go into a conversation with her before she’s willing to talk.”

“Katya…” Kim replied, hesitation evident on her soft face.

“No, I mean it. If I have any chance of getting her to forgive me for being such an asshole I need her to be at least mildly calm, otherwise it’s just going to be a shit show.”

“Fine, I’ll talk to her.”

 

* * *

 

 

_“So, have you lived here for a long time or are you still getting settled?”_

_Katya said nothing as she focused on the focaccia in front of her. It felt weird being in an actual restaurant with a woman who appeared to be genuinely interested in getting to know her – so much so that she had apparently lost the ability to speak. “Katya?” The woman, named Sharon huffed in half annoyance and half amusement._

_She absentmindedly gazed up at the blonde woman sitting across from her – she really did have a thing for women that shared the same hair colour as her, didn’t she – and smiled nervously. “Sorry, this bread just looks really fucking good. Um, I moved here maybe six months ago?”_

_Sharon offered her a lopsided smirk, one pale hand coming up to rest underneath her chin as she leaned back in her wooden chair. “I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who’s so passionate about gluten, but sure. Did you move here for work?” It felt like Sharon was interrogating her. In all honesty, if it hadn’t been for Raja’s insistence that she went on this date, Katya would have never turned up. It felt ruder to decline an offer from a new-found friend than it had been to cancel on the tattooed blonde she was currently trying to decipher._

_Katya wondered how to best answer her question. She knew the appropriate thing would be to lie and say that she was just looking for some new opportunities, not that she had dumped the possible love of her life and left her career in shame. Maybe somewhere in the middle of a natural adventurer and an absolute train wreck was the best approach. “I broke up with my girlfriend and decided that I needed to grab life by the balls, or ovaries, if you will.” A nervous chuckle erupted from her throat as she spoke, giving her usually deep voice an unnatural lightness._

_Sharon seemed less than bothered by her vague explanation and took a sip of her soda. “I can respect that. Sometimes we need to just say fuck it all and get the hell out, y’know.” Having decided for herself after a lot of internal conflict that Katya needed to take her own fake advice, she looked around the table and sighed to herself before spouting out: “Speaking of, would you like to get the hell out right now? I’m horny, emotional and – if we’re being totally honest – a bit bored.”_

_She had tried that trick with other girls before, never **her** , but other girls; essentially ones that didn’t matter when they huffed and left without her instead. Needless to say, she was surprised as Sharon shrugged and reached behind her to put on her black trench coat. “Sure, my place or yours?”_

_Sharon Needles ended up being the perfect distraction that Katya so desperately needed._

 

* * *

 

 

A week went by without a single word from either Kim or Trixie. A week was fine, she had to collect her thoughts either way – but when she had counted fifteen days without a single trace from either woman her patience grew thin. She had promised not to put herself in any position that might compromise her progress in any way, however, knowing that she had pissed Trixie off so much was nagging on her conscience far too much.

Of course, no matter how desperately she wanted to apologize to Trixie she knew that there was no point in trying to suede the younger woman too early. If Trixie needed time away from Katya, then that would be the least she could do for her.

On the other side of town, Trixie groaned under her breath as she got off from work. The expensive, wooden doors of the gallery she worked at closed heavily behind her with a sigh that could only indicate it had been through the ringer more than once over the years. Her day had consisted of fetching coffee and running errands, as usual. Nothing about her job enticed her like she had originally thought, it was tedious and stressful at the same time but with few rewards. She had been able to attend a meeting with some influential investors, yet it was not enough to satisfy her need for success.

What with everything that had gone on in the last couple of weeks, new challenges and opportunities at her place of work had been more than welcomed. She had not seen Katya since her party, nor had she any intention of doing so just yet. After what her bull headed ex-girlfriend had done, Trixie had every objective to let the older woman sweat a bit more.

 

* * *

 

 

_Trixie had only just managed to grasp the concept of Sasha’s lips on her own when her friend pulled back, a faint smile still evident on her full lips. She seemed expectant, so much so it made Trixie’s heart ache. Sasha had done nothing wrong, they had been friends for a while and had spent wonderful times together, yet all Trixie wanted to do was to run after her mindless ex that had just cursed her off, but she knew she couldn’t. At least not until she had sorted out the situation in front of her._

_“Sasha…” Trixie swallowed audibly, her voice trailing off when she realized she hadn’t yet figured out what to say._

_“Listen, I know this was sudden, I just figured that I had to try.” Sasha explained herself, her smile fading as she watched Trixie’s anxious eyes looking back at her._

_“I’m not sorry you did it, if we had been in any other situation maybe something could happen, but…” Trixie started, worriedly rubbing her upper arms as she spoke. She didn’t even realize her hands were shaking until Sasha comfortingly placed her steady hands upon her own. “But it’s not me that you want. I get it.” There was no denying the sorrow in Sasha’s voice as she lamented what Trixie had been struggling to say. Nevertheless, it was the truth._

_“I’m sorry. I am sure you will find someone amazing, I just don’t think that person is me. It wouldn’t be fair to you, not when I’m still trying to figure out what to do about Katya.” Trixie finally decided to be absolutely frank with her. There was little point in lying to Sasha, even if it was to spare the other girl’s feelings._

_Sasha squeezed Trixie’s hands one final time before letting go. “I think I’ve always known you and Katya would end up together, but when I saw you two together tonight I realized this might be my only chance to get this out in the open. If it makes you feel any better, she definitely wants you back too.” Sasha stopped to cross her arms over her chest and sigh before she continued, making it apparent that was she was about to say was an uncomfortable thing to say for her. “I’ve never seen Zamo look at someone the way she watched me tonight, I really thought she might kill me or something.”_

_Trixie chuckled whilst shaking her head softly. “Yeah, she seems all innocent at first but she can be a real asshole sometimes.”_

_“Are you going to go after her?” Sasha asked inquisitively. Trixie wasn’t sure if it was okay to discuss Katya with Sasha anymore, but she figured that since she asked it should be seen as an attempt to smooth things over. “No, not now. She was really harsh tonight, she needs to apologize to me.”_

_Sasha seemed to be valuing her for a moment before she hesitantly asked: “Are you sure it’s really what you need right now? I swear I’m not asking this because of… You know, but can you even remember a time where things haven’t been complicated between you two? It just doesn’t seem healthy.”_

_Once again, Trixie found herself at a loss for words._

 

* * *

 

 

As time went on without a proper apology from Katya, anger grew within Trixie. She had half-expected the older blonde to be standing outside of her door the next days, flowers and an extensive explanation for her actions already prepared, yet she hadn’t heard a single word from Katya since the party. Trixie wasn’t the one that needed to excuse herself, Katya had sole responsibility for this one.

It had taken her approximately ten minutes to nag Kim into admitting she had met with Katya, which resulted in one of the most intense fights they had ever had. Trixie had apologized immediately afterwards and shuddered at the memory of Kim’s teary-eyed face as she explained that she had only wanted to help Trixie along, there was nothing worse than seeing your friend break down in front of you.

Despite of this, Trixie had still refused to be the one that reached out to Katya, and had made Kim promise to follow her lead. Each day as she opened the door to her apartment, she wondered if she would ever see Katya there – but she never was. Having realized that would be a pipe dream if she ever had one, Trixie had completely given up hope on it ever happening.

So, when she finally made it home from work she immediately dropped her coat to the ground and staggered towards their bathroom with only so much as a grunt to greet Kim before she closed the door behind her. The water felt like her personal salvation as she let the droplets dampen her blonde hair and run along her curvaceous body.

She hummed the tunes of a Dolly Parton song as she shampooed and conditioned her hair, letting herself indulge in the warm air that swallowed her before she heard a loud knock on the door. “Kim, would you get that?” She shouted instinctively as she had many times before. She knew that Violet was supposed to be at theirs later tonight to borrow a coat from Kim, even though she had assumed that deal had gone out the window when the thin brunette had claimed that she needed something ‘super oversized, like, you won’t mind right?’. Of course, Kim had no qualms about her weight, but Violet tended to not present things in the most flattering manner.

The sound of the water sprinkling from the shower blocked out the voices coming from the hallway, and she kept humming on her song until she heard a much softer knock on the bathroom door. Annoyance quickly surfaced through her, until now, calm posterior. “Fuck off, I’m in here!” she shouted, assuming the person that was knocking must have a serious death wish to disturb her daily place of zen.

“… Trixie? It’s me, I think we need to talk.”

It was Katya. Katya was there. ‘ _holy shit’,_ Trixie thought to herself as she reached an unsteady hand out to shut the water off. “Katya? What the… I’ll be right out.” Trixie called out in exasperation, swiftly rummaging her hands through her hair to squeeze out some of the water that was still in there.

In her haste to get out of her small shower cubicle, she miscalculated just how wet the floor actually was and soon found herself slipping. Trixie yelped as she hit the floor, an intense pain in her leg as she landed on it with a loud bang. “Fucking shit, holy motherfucker that hurts.” She growled as she scrambled to get off the floor.

“Trixie? Are you okay?” Katya asked from behind the door, a concerned tone in her voice. “I-I’m fine Katya, just go sit down… fuck, somewhere, I don’t know.” Trixie cursed back at her as she finally got up and out of the shower. She could hear Katya scrambling away from the door, most likely in an attempt to avoid any more scolding from Trixie that she wasn’t already in line for.

Trixie sighed as she wrapped a thick towel around her body and took a quick glance at herself in the small mirror they had over the sink. She looked red and puffy, but there was little that could be done about that at that moment. After quickly drying off her hair with Kim’s towel, she took a deep breath and stepped out of the bathroom. As she stepped into the living room, she didn’t see Katya. ‘ _Where is she?’_ she thought to herself before she turned around and noticed that the door to her room down the hall was wide open. Of course, why not cloud up the small space of sanity Trixie had left.

Katya was seated on Trixie’s pink arm chair, her jean clad legs tapping against each other in a rapid motion. Trixie could see Katya’s blue eyes raking over her body as she walked in, still only in a towel. “There you are.” Trixie greeted in before she quietly closed the door and sat down on her head, staring expectantly at Katya.

Katya, however, had her gaze locked on Trixie’s leg. “Holy shit, Trix, that looks really bad!”. It took a moment for Trixie to actually get what she was going on about, that is before she glanced down at her injured leg and noticed that a large bruise was already forming there. “Yeah, I took a tumble. You scared me half to death, you bitch.”

“Do you need to go to the emergency room? I’ll take you, my car is just downstairs.” Katya began to ramble as she got out of the chair and sat down on the floor in front of Trixie’s dangling legs. In any other situation, Trixie would have been pleased to see her ex sitting right within arm’s length of the lower half of her body, but now was not the time to think about that. “What? No, I’m fine. I’m going to take a wild guess and say that you are here for a reason, so spill it.” Trixie bent down to swat Katya’s hand away from her leg as she stood up and headed towards her wardrobe. She picked out her pink robe and stretched it over her naked arms, turning her back towards Katya as she dropped the towel and closed her robe hastily. Trixie turned back only to see Katya now sitting on her bed, staring profusely onto her lap. “I’m done now, Katya.”

“Oh, yeah, of course.” The Russian replied nervously as she looked back up at Trixie. “It’s just, I haven’t heard from you since the party. I figured I should keep my distance and let you cool off, but you never got in touch and I figured that I at least owe you an apology.”

Katya’s pleading eyes was typically enough to make Trixie forgive her for anything, but this time it just seemed to anger her more. She sat down in the arm chair Katya had abandoned earlier and growled under her breath. “You’re the one that should apologize to me, we already established that, that means _you_ are the one that gets in touch!”

“I know, I know; I really just thought I should give you some time. Obviously if you’re seeing Sasha now I should just back off, but…” Katya started as she nervously fiddled with her flannel shirt, her short legs now tucked underneath her ass. Trixie could only roll her eyes at her response, she had obviously forgotten how Katya behaved after she had done something wrong. “You are so stupid; do you know that?”

Katya looked up at her, a crimson blush spreading across her cheeks. “That’s not news to me, no.”

“I’m not dating Sasha, not that it wouldn’t be easier than having to deal with your bullshit.” Trixie pointed out in a sharp tone of voice, her penetrating stare causing Katya to buckle under pressure, as it always did. Realizing she wasn’t going to get much else than a mumble from Katya, she decided to continue her rant. “Honestly, you seemed like you wanted to be friends and yet you still fly off the handle at _me_ when I haven’t done anything wrong! If you wanted to start something up again that’s seriously not the way to do it.”

Her words seemed to awaken something at Katya, who stared at her incredulously, like what Trixie said was the most outrageous thing in the world. “You’re the one that walked back into _my_ life, Trixie Mattel – not the other way around! You know as well as I do that meeting again just took us right back to where we started.”

“Well, that must be the most romantic declaration of love that I’ve ever heard.” Trixie sarcastically commented, her arms now crossed over her chest as she did the same to her legs, ignoring the shooting pain in her injured knee as she annoyingly dangled her legs over each other.

Pushing Katya’s buttons to the point where she got seriously angry was a difficult feat to pull off, but Trixie could see that she had gotten her there this time. The older woman started to stand up, her face still as red as it had been before and her thick, red-painted bottom lip quivering as she spoke: “Shut up Trixie, I mean it.”

Trixie watched her as Katya took a tentative step towards the arm chair Trixie was currently squatting in, and valued her level of anger before she made her next move. “Or what?” she challenged her, a thick brow raised at Katya as the older woman took another step towards her. “You’re the one that behaves like a bratty kid whenever we meet, why should I give you the time of day? I thought you were over me?”

“Trixie…”

“You screwed me right out of your system, didn’t you? Isn’t that what that Sharon girl was all about?” Trixie spat, her entire body on edge as something within Katya appeared to crack at Trixie’s hurtful words. The older woman surged forward, each of her thin arms clamping on the arm rests of Trixie’s chair as she leant forward and furiously pressed their lips together.

There was no real surprise in the kiss, Trixie had known somewhere in her mind that was where it would go. She welcomed it, encouraged it in every way as she tried to press Katya’s buttons. Her arms immediately snaked around Katya’s neck and drew her down, closer to her as she felt the older woman rummage around their fronts, hastily unbuttoning her shirt and sloppily tossing it behind her when she was done, all without breaking their kiss. Trixie’s hands rubbed around Katya’s back, falling into old practiced movements as she unhooked the clasp on Katya’s bra and slipped it off her.

A small, embarrassing moan escaped her lips as Katya hooked her arms around Trixie’s waist and yanked her up from the chair and turned her around only so she could push Trixie down onto the bed. Trixie scrambled to get further up onto the bed, watching Katya as she quite literally threw off her jeans and went to join Trixie on the bed, slowly sneaking up her body, hungry eyes watching her. Before she could reach Trixie’s face, Katya suddenly stopped. Her heaving breath and shaky arms that were bracketed on either side of Trixie showed how little restraint she had left within her, yet she asked hoarsely: “Are you okay with this?”.

This caused Trixie to roll her eyes even if she knew consent was incredibly important in a situation like this. “Yes.” She replied, disrobing herself to further prove her point. It was all the confirmation Katya needed as she delved onto Trixie’s body, leaving harsh kisses and love bites all around her neck. It was like she was marking Trixie as her own again, trying to erase whatever time they had been apart.

If Kim was still home, she would surely have wished that she wasn’t. Trixie had never known Katya to be so intense before, it was as if all inhibition had left her body when they kissed or when she finally reached down to stroke Trixie. The sex itself was rough yet intimate, each movement causing Trixie to give up a piece of herself. It just felt right, like there was no place Katya could ever be that would be as right as when she was between Trixie’s legs, making her plead for her release. Katya finally granted it to her, not really expecting anything in return when she saw just how spent Trixie was.

Trixie, however, had other plans in mind as she only took a moment to regain her composure before she set to work and got Katya to plead, just like she had only a few moments earlier.

Their bodies were spent afterwards, all the gust pushed out of them as Trixie wrapped an arm around Katya’s waist and rested her head on her chest. Sweat trickled down Katya’s forehead and into her hair, the small beads serving as a reminder of what they had just done. “Are you good?” Katya whispered, her chest still heaving.  She appeared to have returned to normal, none of her previous anger still there to get them started again.

Trixie fastened her grip on Katya’s waist, almost as if she was scared the moment would end. “I’m good, great even.” She replied, a chuckle playing on her dry lips.

“Think you’re ready to have our talk?”

“Just give me a moment.”

 


End file.
